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Ok, so what hasn’t been written in regards to this topic? I know, next to nothing. So, why am I writing in regards to it? Well, besides killing time waiting for Kristin Kreuk to discover my existence and receive me as her one and only unfeigned love, I thought I’d splash a thimbleful of cold water in the face of blind idealism. You know — a wake-up call, a fly in the Vaseline, a rock in your sock (Alas, I guess that shatters my Kristin fantasy, doesn’t it?) Uh-huh, I may listen the grumbling starting to crescendo to the inevitable, “C’mon man, don’t harsh my mellow! Why are you attempting to admonish people from following their dreams?” Alright, let’s get something straight — I am attempting to do no such thing. I am a dream-follower myself and most likely will stay so for the rest of my life. I am plainly saying that before you severely embark on an acting career please, please, please make sure you want to be an actor; like, you cannot live without being an actor; like, if it’s a choice among your original born and acting, then little Suri gets the ol’ heave-ho! No, I’m severe here folks, because it may in truth come down to a choice among your dream career and a spouse and children. Sure, healthy, functional nuclear families may and do include actors, but the extraordinary challenges an actor ought to face to merely give himself a prospect at success are anathema to finding and securing a long-term mate (especially one outside of the amusement industry). By the way, when I say “success,” I’m speaking of being a systematically working actor. I am not talking in regards to star-dumb, celebrity-dumb, or any sparkly vernacular employed to describe the demigod-like status our society bestows upon those who entertain the masses, but I digress. Simply put, very often times acting equals loneliness and some shades thereof. This is specially unfeigned if you are male. Despite egalitarian attempts to dissociate the term “provider” from the definition of what it means to be a man, very few women will want to help your broke thespian bum while you’re keepin’ it real; and, in good sense of right and wrong you shouldn’t suppose it, even for the duration of the poorest of times. If you are competent to find that special an individual with the empathy, respect and love it takes to commit to a engaged in a struggle actor, then you are fortunate indeed; however, you’re not out of the woods yet. As a working actor, you will find yourself a-way — on tour, on film shoots, on auditions, etc. How will your substantial other feel regarding you being out of town so often? Move over Rover. If you’re Matt Damon, you may afford to take your wife and kids with you, but Natt Hamon ain’t so lucky (Um, if you’re reading this Natt — no disrespect). Some humans say, “There’s no such thing as luck,” or “Eh, you make your own luck.” I respectfully disagree with the former and conditionally agree with the latter. Within your circle of influence you may affect modify or “make your own luck,” but there is a point beyond which randomness (or something else) reigns and, undertake as you may, your attempts don’t mean squat. Generally speaking, that’s life. As it appertains to acting, you may magnify that statement one hundred fold. Talent, continuing or repeating behavior and preparedness will take an actor only so far. The missing ingredient is sheer, random luck. We’re talking lottery, camel through the needle eye kind of odds — being in the right place at the right time; meeting, and being cherished by, the right person(s); and, being born into the right family with the right connections. The sad truth is very few will be so lucky. Remember too — it’s a little club with fixed space and the current members don’t actually want you to join, because you’re more competition; who may blame them? You may, however, be justified in keeping a lot of self-proclaimed “business of acting” gurus accountable for nefariously or ignorantly leading you astray to make a buck. Most of their schemes must be taken with a grain of salt. That is not to say you won’t pick-up a few utile tips, or that you shouldn’t undertake the proverbial mass mailing (if you’re young, stunningly beauteous and/or graduating from Juilliard, you may get a response), but please grasp it’s all when it comes to the Benjamins. Agents, managing directors and casting managers are in business to make money. Most are not specially mesmerized in laying out capital a great deal of time and crusade to nurture your career from seed to finelooking blossom (especially agents and casting directors). They want you to already have a great deal of impressive credits — a proven resume they feel they may work with and net profit from. That begs the question, “How do I get those impressive credits if agents, managers and casting managers don’t want to meet or work with me?” Ah, there’s the rub. It’s a catch 22, my friend, and only the specially wily and, yes, lucky manage to escape from that dastardly loop. I wish I could tell you precisely how to solve this conundrum, but besides never giving-up there in truth is no tried and unfeigned blueprint except to say: strive to create probabilities for yourself (e.g. Stallone and Rocky); put yourself in the thick of it — hang out where industry folks hang and keep your eyes peeled and ears open for opportunities; and, try to get referrals from humans whom agents and the like know and trust. Caution: use sound judgment regarding paying industry humans for the probability to be seen. In such cases, one will have to ask, “Why are successful industry persons who genuinely have the power to open a door for you taking the time to run or participate in showcase classes? Shouldn’t they be off doing what they assert to do?” Of course, a heap of of these people may legitimately receive pleasure from instructing and consider it a good way to scout new talent. However, a healthful dose of equivalent elements skepticism and exploration is prescribed before plunking down your cash and lifting up your hopes. You must be skeptical with regards to the motivatings of the actor sitting next to you at the audition as well. Competition is fierce. No matter how friendly or disarming they seem, always do not forget you’re battling over a role, so never lower your guard. Maintain the killer intuition with a smile. Another thing to question is why humans want to pursue acting professionally. Obviously, there is no simple answer to that one; there are as some specific reasons as there are aspiring actors. Generally speaking, however, galore people in our celebrity-obsessed society will roll the bones on an acting career based solely on their collective need for fame and fortune. Forget about: a authenti desire to act, to invent art with your person, to serve the story, to make myth applicable to today, to connect with your fellow actors and your audience in a distinctively communal manner, or merely do what you feel you were born to do. Hogwash! String that namby-pamby up forthwith! It’s no wonder why there are so numerous people vying for so few roles making it almost inconceivable to break into the “business.” It wouldn’t hurt for you to candidly closely question or examine your deeper motivations for carrying out or participate in an acting career as well. So, we’ve briefly discussed loneliness, luck and layout. What else must you consider before attempting such an odyssey? Frankly, I could drone on and on with regards to it and bore you (and myself) to tears, so let’s undertake a little stream of cognizance experiment instead, shall we? Sure, I’ll just spun a little rhyme in an undertake to succinctly capture the psycho-emotional toll which may be in store for you. It goes a little something like this: End of tunnel light — outta sight, black hole night takes all your might and gives back shite, artist-farmer planting seeds in the bright sunlight, but frost comes cold and tight, never growing, always owing money, never honey, bitter mirror shows 10 years gone, then 15, you’re no teen, your friends’ success is mean, baby, you’re lean, baby, sentiment stagnant and stuck, outta luck, Charlatan time to steal your dime and worse — the dream, desperate Vampires prey on, praise on, to drain on, lay assert on your heart – that genesis place of pure and rush, and leave you empty and withered and alone, make no bones. Happy, happy, joy, joy, huh? Granted, it’s an extreme picture, but believe you me it happens. The “Boss” knows, “time slips away and leaves you with not one thing mister, but boring stories of glory days.” You must recognise that it could just as without apparent effort occur to you. Speaking of you, if you’ve made it this far, then have a cigar! I’ve measuredly painted a brief, bleak and barbarically honorable picture which I’m sure hasn’t been much fun to observe. However, I hope you consider it a service, because that’s what it’s meant to be. If you feel like you don’t want to be an actor after reading this, that’s a good thing. Follow Mr. Scrooge’s counsel and “decrease the surplus population.” You’ll be much happier for it (and so will I). On the other hand, if you feel like your resolve to be an actor has been strengthened by this article, that’s a good thing too. It means you genuinely want it. It means it’s in all probability what you are meant to be, so fight, me hearties, fight; follow Mr. Thomas’ counsel and “do not go tame into that good night”! See you at the audition! Or, not… Copyright (c) 2009 Seamus Mac Giolla Mhartain. All Rights Reserved |




